Mar 3, 2008

limitless life


i was used to a me all stilted

and stressed

i never knew

how to be

resilient and free

before i moved out of my house

and left a life

that never quite fit

i could not list 20 things i truly liked

much less have told you what my deepest desires are
or were

or will be

i was just so caught up

in the fear

that there wasn't enough love

i had to grasp and reach and catch it

keep it in a cage and under control

i couldn't be free

or let go

or let anything be

and now...i can feel a shift

in so many parts of me

a quietness that i never knew

i craved

a place inside me

that wants to be heard

by only me

i'm learning how to say no

i'm eating more healthfully

not starving my body

trying again, to control

i'm taking walks

gaining a sense of direction

(okay..i'll might always get lost, but i am trying:)

and i am taking action

instead of talking about the things i want to do

i am taking the time to do them

and they are not huge feats, by any means

they are small micro-movements

but they are mine



5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I smiled wide when I saw this cherry blossom- if it is:)-I think. Either way, it sums up so much of what I feel of you. Angel wings, growth as in the tree, and definitely a cherry bloosom- refreshing love. Your words are beautiful and full of truth.

love and blossoms to you my loving friend.

Anonymous said...

and I love best when I say- cherry bloosom, instead of blossom. Awesome. sigh.

Anonymous said...

you know that's my cheery bloosom tree....

mccabe said...

sweet amanda,
you are living BEAUTY.
love your simple,
wise words...

love YOU
mccabe x

Larry Watts said...

Very nice...