a perfectly lovely night.

soap bubbles stuck in webs.

a card for new newest wildest one.

a thank you for one who inspires

a card for the one who always loved them best.

welcome home

to a bright place

filled with so much love

i know you are happy there

i miss you here.

the darkest parts

I should not be too hard on myself.
I should not beat myself up.
I should fill my belly with yummy foods.
And let you love me.
I am not trapped.
And I am not to be pitied.
I am strong and I deserve love.
But there are the days…when I think
My dad is dead.
My mom is busy with her own life now.
There is no family that I feel a part of.
And there is no love that can get to all my darkest parts.
So I hang on to this pitiful little girl, trapped in a body, that most days does not seem to fit.
And I don’t mean to put that on you.
It’s all mine.
And this past Friday all of those dark places in me felt unexpectedly raw and open.
I actually felt physically sick to my stomach with all of the pain rising up in me.
Trying to push its way out.
I felt ugly and not good enough.
I lost sight of all the beauty inside me.
Inside everything.
But I what I want, where I’m trying to be with myself
And in turn, with you,
Is this place where all my open and raw parts are welcomed with love.
And I am truly able to just be me.
So for all the walls I try to build up and all the bullshit human ego driven behavior.

Please know at the center of it all is love.

panty time

rocks for my display inspired by this lovely mermaid

tags for my panties!!!

not a small feat for me. a girl who for maybe um 2 years now (maybe longer :)) has been wanting to design a panty line called sweet cheeks.

i posted the last designs. hand sewn hearts onto way-to-big grandma panties. my first attempt. i was not in love with the product. but more importantly, so scared to sell. i practically ran away from the booth all 3 days. my sweet sweet roomie, gabriel, and my wonderful man, william, tried to sell the panties to the girls for me. i didn't realize how selling something i made would bring up all sorts of insecurities. making me feel as though i was out there selling parts of my heart. that maybe no one would want...

so for this festival i knew i wanted to try again, but with panties i would proudly wear (not that i don't wear the others, i just look like i'm in a diaper when i do). so in my time crunch i ordered again from american apparel, but this time, i am having my own designs screen printed on them. i dropped them off today and cannot wait until thursday to see the finished product!!!

the pictures above are the tags i worked on all weekend. each pair has a little polymer clay cupcake, strawberry, or tree.

peace.love.and panties.

ra!ra!ra!