real love doesn't expect a thing

3 gentle lovely reminders that life is full

yesterday i started to let negative thoughts flood their way in.

there is isn't enough money in our bank account to buy essentials this week.
i've had to readjust my thinking on what 'essentials' even are.

i've felt a sudden anger towards the family in my life, related and not, who have not called or written or done anything in the way of showing care or love.

i've felt the weight of the gas crisis and gotten tired of waiting in 3 hour lines just so i can fill up with gas that is almost $5/gallon to go and work a job that pays $15/hour.

i've questioned starting my business class at the local business center because in times of such uncertainty, who is buying anything now?

well...that attitude did not fit me well.
i could see it in my reflection
lines deepening in my face
worries adding years

so i took a leap of faith regardless of the economy.

i am taking the class, because putting my intentions out there into the universe will have benefits.

instead of complaining about the lack of love or sensitivity to the death of my dad from others, i choose to love them regardless and without expectation.

as william reminded me, that's the only sort of true love there is.

let's see...what else have i felt shift in?

oh yes, the feeling that the way in which i have chosen to live my life in the past or even in the present has to be the way in the future will also be lived out.

that's not the case.

as i remain present, as i listen to my body and my heart, i will be able to make choices that take me into a healthier future and a more beautiful present moment.

sometimes i feel frivolous and that i should listen to all the people who've always told me
i live my life in a bubble.
life is not about fairies and magic and love.
the only real things are death and taxes. (yuck!)

so i choose today.
to begin anew.
to start fresh.
to shed my past.
to trust my intuition.
to be grateful.
to believe in abundance.
to embrace the loss and the tragedies and know that they serve a purpose too.
not one thing defines me.
i am free to love.
i am free to enjoy.
to experience.
to serve.
to give.