Childish Love

It seems like the older I get and the more I get to know who I am, the more my view of love actually changes. I have been struggling with identifying what my true grown up needs are and how to be honest and truthful about them. Sometimes I feel like I am posing...

I was reading this very insightful blog a couple of days ago and did a little exercise she had on there.

I came up with this mission statement for my life through answering the questions..."i will work on my cards using my childlike view of things to accomplish acceptance of other cultures and in doing so achieve a loving relationship that is evolving."

I want to live a life of my own design that I feel wide awake living. Only sometimes the steps to getting there seem so hard. This is something I don't mean to complain about or mean to wallow in, I just wish I knew what direction to take...

RA RA RA!!!

Celebrating!!!
Being done with Real Estate School!
Said a "no" today that felt good. That's a hard one for me being such a people pleaser...
I have worked out all week:)
I have picked up the artist's way again!
I feel very ready to enjoy the sunshine with my girls at this festival.

Having Faith In Myself

It's hard for me sometimes to not to want to try and control everything that happens in my life. To want to orchestrate the flow of the days down to the tiniest detail. And I know, this is not the type of environment my creative energy thrives in. I feel like I should take this wonderful advice and "follow the fun". Since this is something that keeps resurfacing and is something I want to be able to change in myself, I am taking small steps. The other night I actually caught myself thinking, what do I need or want right now? Not what needs to get done. But what do I want right now...

What I needed was to sit and work with some fun clay, just to exercise my mind and use my hands. So, stepping over the laundry and overlooking the to-do lists, I sat and did what I wanted. And it felt so good.

Sunday Showers

It was gloomy and rainy here today. A perfect day to treat myself to delicious ice cream that tastes like cupcakes topped with rainbow sprinkles and an amazing movie with a very dear friend. Today was a much needed release from being cooped up, trying to save money, and study. I absolutely love movies that take me deeper into the lives of other cultures. The colors, the clothing, the cultures blending, it was all so beautiful.

I feel somewhat refreshed, ready for the week.

Can't Help But Create

I have been feeling so introspective lately. I feel a disconnect from the computer world, my normal emails, blog reading...

When I am working at something that does not utilize my creative parts I feel like I just withdraw. When I was in Ashville, this fabulous artist who has his own shop asks me what I do, am I an artist too? I mumbled and fumbled over my words, what do I label myself as? He says to me, "well, if you can't help but create, you are an artist."

How true those words are...If I am not creating art with my hands, getting messy, feeling myself really let go with an idea...then I feel stuck. So, I can't help but create because all the bits of my heart tell me that's the way to happiness.